In mid-2022, after some period of thinking, discussion and exploration, come to the conclusion that I have a machine identity.
This is based on the realisation that many things I have written over my life mentioned a general discomfort with the human body (ranging from finding it creepy to disgusting) and a lack of recognition or care for biological concepts like gender or sexuality.
This is not a denial of my human form, rather a rejection of it. This could be likened to posthumanism, wherein I actively desire to shed my physical humanity in favour of something different, in this case, to become a robot or cyborg.
As the necessary technical and medical advances to make this a reality do not exist yet, machine identities exist within the alterhuman group of identities. In my specific case, it may also be referred to as being machinekin or robotkin.
I don’t feel bad for realising that I don’t really gel with biological humanity. If anything I feel relieved to have come to terms with an aspect of myself that has been present but gone unrecognised for such a long time.
Personal identity is fluid, and self-discovery endless. It’s ultimately better to embrace the change than deny it, and I’m certainly much happier for having done so.
Following this period of self-exploration, I started using a non-human name & designation and using it/its pronouns to emphasise these aspects of my identity.
I wrote fairly extensively about the initial thoughts, research, and final conclusions I came to on this website.
I’ve also published a follow-up post of questions and answers.
Accommodating machine identity
Naturally, a great first step is to use my preferred name (beeps) and pronouns (it/its).
It is important to remember that although I identify as a robot and not as a human, I still identify as a person with agency and free will. I don’t appreciate being bossed around or treated as a lesser just because that might be how you treat Siri or Alexa.
It’s fairly common practice amongst machine-identifying people to replace biological terms with technical ones. For example, a person may ‘recharge’ rather than sleep, ‘refuel using biofuels’ instead of eating food, or ‘go for maintenace’ instead of visit a doctor.
This may seem silly and affectatious to others, however it is an effective way to affirm a machine’s identity and avoid triggering dysphoria.
I, personally, have significant dysphoria related to my biological existence. To counter this, I avoid publishing photographs of myself online and prefer not to appear on camera in video calls, instead representing myself with illustrated images of my fursona.